It was early morning in Phoenix, and I was getting ready for work. Bob had just turned on the TV in the bedroom and as we both stood there mesmerized by the news reporters words, we witnessed the worst crime committed to the United States in history. I couldn't take my eyes off the screen and felt my emotions rise within me as the smoke billowed from the twin tower. Then...while we watched the tragedy unfold, the other plane hit the second tower. Was it an accident, my mind asked, or was it really an act of terrorism? The plane ignited, sending flames of fire shooting into the sky. Within minutes, the first tower began its descent, crumbling within the ugly smoke, followed by the second tower. Then we learned there was another hijacked plane that had crashed in Pennsylvania, filled with innocent people, leaving America awash in ash and death.
I thought about people I didn't even know that had become a part of me, wanting to never forget who they were. For days I watched rerun after rerun of the nightmarish scenes, imagining demons forming in the smoke. Freedom was forever ripped from my mind as I tried to understand why Al Quaida hated us so much. Every time I heard the words Iraq, Muslim, or Isama bin Laden, it made my heart burn as hot as the twin tower flames. How could I ever trust again? Now, ten years later, the phrase "9/11" still brings instant images to my mind. I still feel a great loss and think about our soldiers dying every day to keep our country safe.
Do I still feel anger and fear? Do I wonder if every person that wears Muslim attire is bad and means to harm? Do I worry that America is just one step away from destruction and feel that I can never trust again?
If I am honest, I would say that sometimes those feelings surface in my mind, but the other part of me, the Christ-filled believer part of me says God is greater than anything America endures. He loves Muslims and Iraqis as much as He loves me and trust means knowing that no matter what happens this day or next, God's in control and provides peace inside and out.
Where are you on 9/11?
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